'The Buzz' AKA Swimming Too Far From Shore.

Moving away from the world of music psychology, this week’s blog is inspired by a recent book I have been reading on dopamine.

It’s a big buzz word in the modern world of social media and it’s often simplified within the realms of ADHD but anyway, the book offered some interesting insight for us performers. More specifically, when we reach the emotional highs of achievement, fame and success. Sometimes we get to experience such highs that it can often be difficult to lead a normal life. I have seen this in my clinical practice and to a certain extent my own industry experience.

The book framed this within the life, achievements and struggles of Buzz Aldrin, the guy that did the moon thing. Buzz Aldrin’s struggle with addiction and depression after returning from the Moon was deeply tied to a loss of purpose, personal identity issues, and unresolved family trauma. In his memoir Magnificent Desolation he reflected on how achieving one of humanity’s greatest milestones left him emotionally adrift, potentially resonating with the success of music stardom.

After walking on the Moon, Aldrin found himself wondering what could possibly follow such an extraordinary achievement. He wrote; 

"I had been to the Moon. What was I supposed to do with the rest of my life?". 

This abrupt shift from global fame back to ordinary life left him feeling disconnected and without direction. After retiring from NASA and the Air Force, he entered civilian life, which lacked the structure and mission-focused discipline he had previously thrived on. This led to depression and self-medicating with alcohol on top of a family history of mental illness and suicide. Additionally, being known primarily as "the second man on the Moon" also weighed heavy on Aldrin. He felt overshadowed and somewhat dismissed. As he puts it:

"Neil was the commander, the first man on the Moon. I was the other guy. People didn’t even remember my name."

Although Aldrin’s struggles were associated with the moon landings, it does resonate deeply with some of the mental health difficulties I see in my practice and in personal relationships with musician friends. The ascent to fame, success and recognition and then the subsequent crash landing can really mess with our heads. One minute we’re up on top of the world and then we can become the person that ‘used to be’. It’s a messy industry that can be incredibly destructive if we’re left alone with our struggles when ‘the phone stops ringing’.

The book, and Aldrin’s insight resonated deeply with a great quote from one of my Tonic Music radio show guests who described this journey as people ‘swimming too far from shore’. I translated this into believing the music industry hype to such an extent that we lose ourselves and can’t get back. Luckily we do now have resources to support this journey. 

Incidentally, Aldrin, eventually sought treatment and became an advocate for mental health and addiction recovery, showing remarkable honesty and resilience.

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Adam Ficek hosts a monthly show 'Tonic Music' on Totally Wired Radio, where he talks to various guests about music and mental health. You can listen again to any of the previous show on the Tonic Music Mixcloud page.